Did you know that ninety-five percent of what sets the course of our lives is completely outside our control?  This would include such things as the century in which we were born, who our parents and family are, our childhood environments, physical stature, IQ, natural talents, and many of the circumstances we find ourselves in. 

Now I have to admit that up until this past week if someone had said this to me - and assuming the genius who quantified this statistic is correct - my ego would have been blown to smithereens.  Why?  Because I had always liked to believe I had made it all on my own - one hundred percent - that I am a self-made man.  Instead, the most I can take credit for is five percent at best?!!  But this past week as my thoughts have been occupied with the earthquake victims in Haiti it has caused me to consider otherwise; for if my life which is filled with good fortune is ninety-five percent circumstantial then surely the same must hold true for the thousands upon thousands of Haitian victims who have been stricken by misfortune. 

So what does all this mean?  Well, first of all for me it is a humbling realization that most of my blessed life has been a gift rather than something earned or deserved.  But perhaps more importantly since ninety-five percent of my good fortune is a gift which was neither earned or deserved, my conscience challenges me to consider if it is all mine to keep.  And as Haiti reminds us there is tragedy, loss, poverty, brokenness, and devastation all around.  So shouldn’t much be expected from those of us to whom much has been given? 

Which gets back to the statistic:  If in fact ninety-five percent of what sets the course of our lives is completely outside our control, meaning it is circumstantial, that leaves only five percent over which we can control.  But it is within that five percent that we are given the power to choose what we do with the other ninety-five.  What are you doing with yours?

You’ve probably heard the old joke that if you want to make God laugh make plans.  Well, I’m not so sure about God’s sense of humor about it all, but it does seem to hold true that many of our best-laid plans do go awry while much that does happen in our lives are things we never planned for.  Am I right? 

Consider the devastating earthquake that occurred this past week in Haiti.  Name one person who had that event scheduled on his or her day-planner.  Pick any such disaster throughout history and the same holds true.  But the same also holds true for the positive events in our lives - the opportunities that come our way.  Seldom do they occur as we planned, if planned at all.  How, then, if it was not planned were people from around the world able to respond so immediately to the tragedy in Haiti?  The only answer is that thankfully there are those who are prepared to respond when disasters occur no matter what they might be.  

There are things for which we plan and others for which we prepare, there’s a difference.  Planning equips us for the expected; preparing equips us for the unexpected.  An architect, for example creates a plan, a blueprint for building a house or a building.  A finance professional develops a financial plan to provide for our retirement.  A traveler plans the route he will take.  A parent on the other hand does not plan a child’s life, but prepares the child for life.  Armies prepare to defend us from enemy attacks.  Relief organizations prepare in order to respond to disasters such as those in Haiti.  Education prepares us for vocations, careers, and life.  

Plans may not always pan out the way - well, the way we planned them to, if at all, and that’s probably why we imagine that God must chuckle when we make them in the first place.  Does that mean we should simply live by the seat of our pants?  Hardly!  Wise, successful people are planners, for it is plans that provide direction in our lives.  And wise, successful people are also preparers, for it is preparation that equips us to respond when the inevitable unexpected occurs.

“If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer.  Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or far away.” - Henry David Thoreau 

In her book, A New Set of Eyes, Paula D’Arcy tells a great story that occurred while attending an educational event several years ago at Yale University.  “Upon arriving,” she wrote, “two hundred counselors and educators were led into an auditorium and were given a word problem that had a mathematical answer.  Without benefit of paper or pencil we had to solve the problem and then stand with any others whose answer agreed with our own.  Three groups were formed.  The largest group, which I joined, thought the correct answer to the problem was 38.  Approximately eighty-eight others believed the correct answer was 21.  Two men [however] decided the answer was 11.  The program organizers then left, promising to return in one or two hours.  In their absence they wanted each group to convince everyone in the room that their answer was the right answer. . . In time the largest group grew larger, becoming the clear majority.  When the leaders reappeared, the second group had shrunk to thirty-five and the two men who originally believed 11 was the correct answer had never changed their minds, but also never convinced anyone else to join them.  I remember the evening with a certain vividness.  The correct answer was revealed to be 11.” 

Within democracy majority rules, but that does not mean that majority is always right.  In fact, often times the greatest ideas and greatest solutions come from the oddballs who zig when everyone else zags.  They are the innovators, inventors, and entrepreneurial thinkers.  They are the ones who step to the music of a different drummer. 

Each of us has that capacity, I believe, to be the oddball with the great ideas and great solutions - if only we have the courage to trust that different drummer we sometimes hear and to step to his music.

What does it mean to be tolerant?  Or perhaps the better question is, how do we practice appropriate tolerance in today’s world?  On the one extreme some might answer that tolerance means anything goes, to simply live and let live.  At the other end of the spectrum are those who believe tolerance should not be tolerated at all, that doing so is simply sending society to hell in a handbag.  The problem with the two extremes is that one lends itself to a world of chaos with no common value system and sense of order, while the other leads to exclusivity and isolationism, thus perpetuating the divisions and adversities that already exist in this increasingly global society.  

My friends who periodically volunteer to work inside prisons - and there are a number of them who do this - have taught me more about practicing tolerance than anyone I know.  What I’ve observed about them is twofold:  (1) Upon returning from a weekend on the “inside” they always refer to the men they encounter by their first names, that is as fellow human beings and never as prisoners, inmates or criminals; yet (2) neither do they ever excuse them for their offenses.  Instead, by spending time with these incarcerated individuals they come to understand them as real people with real feelings, real desires and real needs to be loved and to love, to forgive and be forgiven.  My friends often times reflect on the fact that they -  indeed all of us - are only one bad decision away from being in the same circumstance.  There but by the grace of God am I. 

There is a marvelous scene in the movie “Invictus” in which Nelson Mandela (played by Morgan Freeman) is being scolded for his acts of forgiveness and peacefulness toward those who had imprisoned for almost three decades.  In his response he said something to the effect that he had gotten to know his enemies, the promoters of apartheid.  He had read their poetry, studied their writings, and engaged them in conversation.  And while not condoning their actions and beliefs, he had nonetheless learned to understand them as human beings, thus proving the point that practicing tolerance in today’s world does not require us to relinquish or compromise our values.  Yet, neither can we hide from the culture by isolating ourselves.  Rather, tolerance begins with understanding of our fellow human beings.  Then, and only then, can we earnestly extend forgiveness, establish harmony and respect, and position ourselves to effect positive change.